The Art Of Coaching

E214 | Why Great Leaders Shouldn’t Worry About Being Liked

Welcome to 2022- where positivity is trendy, motivational quotes plaster coffee shop walls and the “self-help” and “leadership” sections of bookstores have become one. 

 

This may be the norm, but it’s not productive for society. 

 

In our messy world, reducing complex human behavior and leadership to clichés and black & white thinking can be both dangerous and ineffective. 

 

True leadership requires authenticity- acting in accordance with one’s true self. A leader who is worried about being liked will not make decisions in the best interest of those they lead and/or risk burnout. 

 

On today’s episode we discuss:

1. Why you shouldn’t worry about being liked
2. The  evolutionary & psychological origins of “likeability”
3. What we can do to work through the likeability obstacle
4. How wanting to to be liked leads to burnout & other disastrous outcomes

 

Part of developing and sharing your authentic self comes from knowing how to communicate effectively. Join The Conscious Coaching Challenge: 30 Days of communication material, challenges, access to our team, weekly Zoom Q&A’s and giveaways! Starting SOON! 

 

As you heard mentioned on today’s episode: understanding someone’s drives is a CRUCIAL part of understanding how to lead them. Take the Drives Quiz here. 

 

Finally, shoutout to the sponsors of today’s episode: Dynamic Fitness & Strength and Momentous. Dynamic is our title sponsor and our go-to equipment guys. If you need anything for your home or full-sized gym- they offer the most affordable, customizable, durable equipment on the market. 

Momentous is our oldest partner, but they are STILL improving their product. If you are looking for the best tasting and cleanest protein out there, look no further. Code: BRETT25 gets you 25% off your first order!

E213 | UFC Bantamweight Champion Julianna Peña: Being Coachable & Capitalizing on the Moment

It’s not everyday we get to welcome a world champion to our show- let alone one willing to dive into the weeds on everything from building a brand to standing up for yourself when no one else will. 

Julianna Peña is the reigning UFC Bantamweight Champion and ESPN’s 2021 Female Fighter of The Year (among MANY other awards). Her victory over Amanda Nunes has been called one of the greatest upsets in all of sport and today she joins us from Las Vegas where she’s (at the time of the recording) filming The Ultimate Fighter (TV show) and training to defend her title. 

On today’s episode we cover:

• Cutting through the B.S and building a trustworthy team around you 
• How to craft an authentic brand & lasting legacy in today’s world
• The difference between liking & respecting opponents and coaches
• Why / how to stand up for yourself even when no one’s with you

As Julianna mentioned in this episode, building your brand isn’t just about getting your name and face in front of more people- it’s about building relationships with those who follow you and creating a legacy and reputation that will stand strong even when you’re gone. 

That’s precisely what we want to help you do at our Brand Builder workshop. This is the final call and we only have a few spots left!

Check out Artofcoaching.com/brand for more information!

Connect with Julianna:

Via instagram: @venezuelanvixen

Via Twitter: @venezuelanvixen 

Today’s episode is also brought to you by our partners:

1. DFND: As our official compression partner, DFND is engineered to help everyone who loves to train and compete go harder longer, recover quicker, and get better faster. Their first line of compression wear was tested on special forces trainees under the harshest training conditions in the world, but now they’re worn by athletes at all levels and anyone serious about performance. Use code: AOC20 to get 20% off your order. 
2. Dynamic Fitness & Strength: If you’re in the market for affordable, customizable equipment with customer service that won’t be beat, these are your guys. Their team has over 160 years of coaching experience so they obviously know what coaches and athletes want / need; When you’re ready to build that dream facility, or just upgrade your home gym head to mydynamicfitness.com and tell them the Art of Coaching Team sent you. 

Finally, if you read Conscious Coaching and you’re ready to take the next step- check out the Conscious Coaching Challenge. This 30 day communication challenge is designed for you to do on your own time, from anywhere in the world. For just $99 you will get our best communication content, a community of coaches and direct access to our team.

E212 | The Real Reason People Don’t Invest In Themselves Like They Should

None of us have an abundance of both time AND money. So why do some people invest in themselves while others fall back on the same excuses over and over again? 

It’s simple- for those that don’t invest, either they don’t believe in a particular brand, the product or their own ability to put it to use.

For those that do, it comes down to understanding and appreciating the long game. Those who invest up front get the greatest returns. 

Don’t believe me? Keep buying cheap appliances and furniture your whole life. 

In this short episode, I’ll cover:

• The reasons you should invest your own money and not rely on your school or employer to reimburse you
• How to reframe thinking about investing in yourself 
• Ways to ensure your investments pay massive dividends for your future

If you are ready to invest in yourself and / or diversify your investments, we have many options that will double, even triple what you put in financially. 

One of the newest in person workshops we offer is our speaker school. No matter your experience- come grow your confidence, gain guidance and get clarity. It’s not about being perfect, it’s about finding YOUR voice. 

Check out artofcoaching.com/speaker now! we’re capping this event at only 20 people and our next one is coming up in May! 

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Today’s episode is brought to you by our official hydration partner, LMNT. 

At Art of Coaching, we’re obsessed with simple things done savagely well. When it comes to making water taste better and staying hydrated before speaking and after coaching sessions, LMNT is my GO-TO. Get your own sample pack for FREE (only pay $5 for shipping). DrinkLMNT.com/aoc

Support for today’s episode also comes from Dynamic Fitness & Strength. Dynamic offers the highest quality strength and conditioning equipment designed just for you, your space and your budget. Whether you’re looking to outfit your college, high school or professional gym or even just your garage, check out our friends at Dynamic and tell them Team AoC sent you!

E211 | Andrew Leslie & Anton Fero: Bringing Design Thinking to Entrepreneurship

More often than not, our brilliant ideas are stymied because we lack the skills to properly think through them and take the first step; We get stuck.

• How do I put this into words and get it out of my head?
• How do I communicate this in a way that will allow others to share my vision?
• How should this look or feel or function?
• Will this even work? And what happens if it does?

On today’s episode, we’re joined by a team of innovators who help people realize and capture their creativity in a way that allows them to share it with the world. 

With an education and background in Design Thinking, Andrew Leslie worked for 8 years in innovation strategy for numerous fortune 500 companies- traveling the world helping brands forecast, create and innovate. Anton Fero, his business partner, was both in the performing arts and built a faith based community as a pastor before turning a garage gym into a multi-million dollar facility. 

During the pandemic they joined forces to rethink the functionality of the gym and began their own business and coaching consulting business, Comn. 

On today’s episode we cover: 

• How to apply design thinking to any business or idea
• The two biggest mistakes we make when creating something new & how to avoid them
• Why it’s essential to have skin in the game & the ROI of hiring your own coach
• The essential tools for building a business that lasts

Get in touch with Andrew & Anton:

Via Instagram: @comncollective

Via their website: comncollective.com

Via their gym: bluehousefitness.com

You probably heard on today’s episode that we are launching a 30-DAY CHALLENGE. This is a brand new program designed to teach and help you apply the most important communication and interpersonal skills to your everyday life. Through a dedicated online community, PDF printouts, community and individual challenges and direct access to our team, learn more about the April challenge HERE.

As for the sponsors of today’s show: 

• DFND: As our official compression partner, DFND is engineered to help everyone who loves to train and compete go harder longer, recover quicker, and get better faster. Their first line of compression wear was tested on special forces trainees under the harshest training conditions in the world, but now they’re worn by athletes at all levels and anyone serious about performance. Use code: AOC20 to get 20% off your order. 
• Momentous: As our longest standing partner, Momentous has always been my go to protein and sleep supplement. All NSF approved, these are the cleanest and best tasting performance supplements in the game. Use code BRETT25 for 25% off your first order! 
• LMNT: With no sugar and no additives, LMNT is how I manage to maintain my voice when speaking for 16 hours and traveling every other weekend of the year. Right now, they are offering you a free 8-flavor sample pack (just pay $5 shipping) if you go to drinkLMNT.com/aoc!
• Dynamic Fitness & Strength: Dynamic is our title sponsor and our go-to equipment guys. If you need anything for your home or full-sized gym- they offer the most affordable, customizable, durable equipment on the market.

E210 | Assertiveness: How to Ask for What You Want and Get What You Need

Assertiveness is key to getting what we want and/or need, but getting it wrong can cost us tremendously…

“When we push too hard, or in an ineffective way, our counterparts may resist giving us the material outcomes we want or our relationships might fray. When we do not push hard enough, we fail to have our own needs met and risk undermining our own well‐being.” (Ames, 2008)

So what do we do when we rely on assertion to get to our desired outcome but each person we interact with will define, interpret and react to it differently?

On today’s episode we break down:

• What is assertiveness and how does it differ from aggressiveness?
• How can we properly align our assertive behavior with the situation?
• The bright side of assertiveness we’ve been neglecting 
• What (if any) is the difference in assertiveness for females vs. males?
• Tactics and strategies for being more assertive

Speaking of assertiveness… We’ve been getting a lot of questions recently about how to improve communication in personal relationships. While much of what we share pertains to improving our professional communication skills, all of these same tactics can and should be applied at home. 

If you want a place to practice having a hard conversation with your parents, negotiating with your kids or even just relating better to your spouse, come to our Apprenticeship communication workshops- our next one is in Des Moines, Iowa (April 9-10th). You can also check out where else we’ll be going by going to artofcoaching.com/events

Today’s episode is brought to you by two of our partners: 

Dynamic Fitness & Strength: If you’re in the market for affordable, customizable equipment with customer service that won’t be beat, these are your guys. Their team has over 160 years of coaching experience so they obviously know what coaches and athletes want / need; When you’re ready to build that dream facility, or just upgrade your home gym head to mydynamicfitness.com and tell them the Art of Coaching Team sent you. 

VersaClimber: Some people might have a love-hate relationship with these guys but we have a LOVE-LOVE relationship with them. No matter the type of athlete, when it comes to low impact, full body conditioning- there’s not a more efficient piece of equipment out there. Make sure to check them out at versaclimber.com and again, tell them we sent you!

E209 | Lacey Jai Henderson: Beating Cancer, Betting On Yourself & Re-Defining Disability

We like to say meanings are in people, not in words. 

That statement never seemed more true than in reference to today’s guest, Lacey Jai Henderson. After losing her leg to Synovial Sarcoma at 9, Lacey has worked to rewrite the script for people living with disability everywhere. 

Following a Division I athletic scholarship for cheerleading, Lacey started competing in Paralympic Track and Field. Through a long journey of therapy, finding resilience and a lot of time on the track, she became an American Record Holder and a Rio Paralympian. In addition to working as a disability advocate, Lacey is getting her Master's in Sport and Performance Psychology and pursuing her CMPC certification while still training full time for paralympic track and field.

We cover: 

• Maneuvering life changing and/or impossibly hard conversations 
• How to use/approach ever-changing terminology with adaptive/disabled individuals
• Discovering underlying drives and communicating your preferred coaching style
• Why a dark sense of humor can become an important survival technique 

Connect with Lacey:

• Via her podcast: Picked Last in Gym Class 
• Via her social media: @laceyisyourfriend (IG), @laceyisyourfriend (Twitter)
• Via her website: https://laceyjhenderson.com/

And a big shout out to the sponsor of today’s episode LMNT. LMNT is our go-to hydration product. With no sugar and no additives, LMNT is how I manage to maintain my voice when speaking for 16 hours and traveling every other weekend of the year. Right now, they are offering you a free 8-flavor sample pack (just pay $5 shipping) if you go to drinkLMNT.com/aoc!

Support for today’s episode also comes from Dynamic Fitness & Strength. Dynamic offers the highest quality strength and conditioning equipment designed just for you, your space and your budget. Whether you’re looking to outfit your college, high school or professional gym or even just your garage, check out our friends at Dynamic and tell them Team AoC sent you!

We all know public speaking is one of the biggest fears people have; “What would I talk about?” “What if people don’t care?”, “How do I select my approach?” Let us give you confidence, clarity and a community of other people who can help you figure this out. 

If you’re ready to get guidance and you want practice speaking so you can be seen as a subject matter expert in your space, or just better at pitching your ideas, check out artofcoaching.com/speaker for dates and info!

E208 | Robert Greene: Mastering Human Nature & Facing Your Flaws

“True genius, in strategy or anywhere, lies in self-control, self-mastery, presence of mind, and fluidity of thought.” - Robert Greene 

When it comes to the study of human nature, power dynamics and social intelligence, there’s perhaps no one more knowledgeable than Robert Greene. 

Collectively, his 7 (soon to be 8) books have sold more than 20 million copies, and along the way he’s consulted countless world leaders, athletes, politicians and celebrities. 

By scouring human history to understand patterns of behavior, he’s developed the unique ability to take incredibly complex and rich subject matter and whittle it down to key learnings that are relatable, tactical and applicable.  

In this interview, we ask Robert what role communication, self-awareness and social intelligence played in not only his own life but also the historical figures he has dedicated his life to studying. 

We cover:

1. Tips for navigating the messiness of the human condition 
2. Behind the scenes of his new book, The Law of The Sublime 
3. Applying higher level strategy in sports and business 
4. The critical communication skill every coach must prioritize 
5. How our obsession with technology impacts our communication 

 Connect with Robert Greene: 

Via his website / buy his books: https://www.robertgreene.co/

Via his social media: https://linktr.ee/Robertgreene

In this episode, you heard Brett and Robert talk about our live 2 day communication workshop - The Apprenticeship. If you’ve ever wanted to see how you come across to others, learn how to ethically influence people, navigate power dynamics and develop a strategy or approach for solving conflict or having hard conversations- join us! You can find more information and upcoming dates/locations HERE. 

Also, if you want to download a FREE personal finance guide & interview with my father (a financial advisor of 40 years), go to artofcoaching.com/money. We cover the foundations of investing, saving, debt, credit and more! 

We’d also like to thank our sponsors for this episode - Dynamic Fitness and Strength & Momentous. If you’re in the market for the most customizable and affordable gym equipment- tell our guys at Dynamic we sent you. If you’d like cleanest and best tasting protein and supplements on the market, use code BRETT25 at checkout!

E207 | How Perception Impacts Communication & Relationships

Truly objective perception isn’t just difficult, it’s nearly impossible. That means everyday, despite your best efforts, people will interpret your actions, words, and behaviors differently than you intended. 

It’s the same reason why there are Michelin star restaurants certain people love and others hate; Nobel prize winners some revere and others think are a hack. 

While we can’t control people’s perceptions, the more we understand them, the more we can influence them… 

Today’s episode is all about acknowledging and appreciating the multitude of factors that affect perception so we can bridge the gap with our communication and work to prevent unnecessary misunderstandings. 

We cover:

• The 8+ variables affecting perception & how to identify them
• The ONLY tool that can help bridge a perceptual gap  
• The Better Than Average Effect + Theory of Mind: why they matter
• Two ESSENTIAL questions to ask when you’ve been misunderstood 

As mentioned in this episode, if you’re looking for more reading on perception, check out this previously redacted article: Mokusatsu: One Word, Two Meanings.

And If you’ve made it this far, let’s give a huge shoutout to our incredible sponsors and upcoming events! 

1. Dynamic Fitness & Strength is our premier sponsor and go-to supplier of strength equipment. Not only do they have custom options, the fastest turnaround times and most affordable packages, they waste the least amount of material of any equipment company out there. Reach out to them at Mydynamicfitness.com and tell them the AoC team sent you!
2. To support our other sponsors- Momentous, VersaClimber, LMNT, SAGA, & Ice Barrel check out their unique offers for the AoC community at artofcoaching.com/partners.

As for what we have coming up! 

1. Brand Builder Workshop - If you’ve ever wanted to create something of your own, or have ever thought: “How can I help more people?”- this 2 day workshop is for you. Your brand isn’t about selling something, it’s about refining how you relate to others.

Join us March 19-20th, 2022 and let us help you make a difference by scaling your voice, increasing your impact and getting your message out. Visit artofcoaching.com/brand for more information. 

2. Speaker School - We all know public speaking is one the biggest fears people have; “What would I talk about?” “What if people don’t care?”, “How do I select my approach?” Let us give you confidence, clarity and a community of other people who can help you figure this out. 

If you’re ready to get guidance and you want practice speaking so you can be seen as a subject matter expert in your space, or just better at pitching your ideas, check out artofcoaching.com/speaker for dates and info!

E206 | How to Tell Your Partner You Want to Quit Your Job

You’ve been fantasizing about quitting or changing jobs for months and now you’re ready; Making that leap doesn’t scare you, it excites you. The thought of creating something from nothing or joining a team that’s building something from the ground up has driven you to go from fantasizing to finally pulling the trigger. But there is one thing about quitting the job that puts butterflies in your stomach and gives you pause…

Convincing your spouse that now is the time. 

In today's episode, we’ll break down this uncomfortable conversation and give you a simple framework so you can have a more productive discussion with your partner. 

Liz, Brett’s wife, also joins the podcast and interjects her real-life feelings and experiences from when Brett had this conversation with her.  

You’ll learn:

1. How to formulate the conversation to relate to your spouse's experiences 

2. How to time the conversation so it doesn’t come as a surprise to your spouse 

3. Why you can’t simply explain your way through this conversation 

As a bonus at the end of this episode, Brett and Liz use role playing to practice one permutation of this conversation so you can see how the conversation might play out.

Quick shout-out to our podcast partner LMNT. LMNT is our go-to hydration product. With no sugar and no additives, LMNT is how I manage to maintain my voice when speaking for 16 hours and traveling every other weekend of the year. Right now, they are offering you a free 8-flavor sample pack (just pay $5 shipping) if you go to drinkLMNT.com/aoc!

Today’s episode is also brought to you by Dynamic Fitness & Strength. Dynamic is our title sponsor and our go-to equipment guys. If you need anything for your home or full-sized gym- they offer the most affordable, customizable, durable equipment on the market.

Also our partner Momentous: For those looking for the cleanest, best tasting protein and supplements on the market, Momentous is my choice. Their products are for athletes as well as individuals who just want to ensure they are getting enough protein in their diet. Code: BRETT25 gets you 25% off your first order. 

Finally, we are hosting a brand new event, the Art of Coaching Speaker School this May (28-29th) in Atlanta GA. If you’re interested in improving your speaking skill for any situation or capacity, this is the place to do it. We’ll be breaking down how to create a powerful message, how to tailor it to a specific audience and make sure it’s not only heard, but understood. Check out artofcoaching.com/speaker for more!

E205 | Strategies for Becoming a Memorable & Dynamic Speaker

I can almost guarantee that at some point in your life, you’ll need or want to speak persuasively to a group of people. 

Perhaps you’re pitching investors for more money, asking supervisors for a raise, presenting at a national conference or coaxing your kids to bed. 

Regardless of the situation, your ability to refine a message, understand your audience and deliver information in a way that will not only captivate but move them to action is one of the most important skills you can have in your toolbox. 

On today’s episode, Brett and Ali will share their best strategies for finding your voice, understanding your audience and clarifying that message so that you can confidently make the impact you seek.

You’ll learn: 

• The 6 questions you need to ask yourself about before you deliver any talk 

• The 3 tips to grabbing your audience's attention and holding it throughout 

• The 1 thing easily forgotten in a talk that will limit the impact you desire 

Speaking of speaking… We have some EXCITING NEWS!

If you’d like help with any of the things mentioned in this episode including but not limited to refining your message, building your speaking skill or gaining confidence… We'd like to introduce you to our brand new SPEAKING SCHOOL. 

Go to artofcoaching.com/speaker for information and to sign up for our FIRST event!

We’d also like to formally introduce our newest podcast partner- Dynamic Fitness and Strength! 

Dynamic is Brett’s go-to strength equipment manufacturer. Dynamic’s equipment is fully customizable, designed just for you and your team, and made in the heartland of America. If you are looking to outfit your home gym or weight room visit mydynamicfitness.com to get started. Tell them Brett and the Art of Coaching Team sent you.